If I was a thin girl,
No didydidydidydidydidydidydidiet.
All day long I'd noshinoddynosh.
If I was a trim slim girl.
I wouldn't have to diet.
No didydidydidydidydidydidydidiet.
If I was a barely bone and skin,
Slim and trim, really thin girl.
I'd eat my fill of sweets and
choc'lates and cakes
Until they were coming out mine ears.
Gobblin' them up just as fast as a woman can.
Instead of refusing offers of all kinds of candy
For the next one hundred tousand years.
I'd accept a box of choc'lates from a man. Oy!
If I was a thin girl,
No didydidydidydidydidydidydidiet.
All day long I'd noshinoddynosh.
If I was a trim slim girl.
I wouldn't have to diet.
No didydidydidydidydidydidydidiet.
If I was a barely bone and skin,
Slim and trim, really thin girl.
I'd take my pick of icecream, pudding
or jelly,
To complete an extraordinary meal
With lots of potatoes, roast, boiled, mashed or chipped.
And still I'd find a place for a special gateau
That is covered with cream that is real.
Till people think my lid has really flipped.
The most important chefs in town would
come to fawn on me.
They'd ask me to advise them. Everyone would hear their
cries.
"If you please, Mrs.Cohen!" "Pardon me,
Mrs. Cohen!"
Presenting dishes that would cross a fat girl's eyes.
Dydydiddidydiddy...
And it won't make one bit of difference
If they're made with butter, flour or cream.
Cause when you're thin it matters not at all.
If I were thin I'd sit in a smart restaurant
With a menu as big as I am tall.
Selecting dishes with never a qualm or quake.
And all the way through the meal
I wouldn't have to count any calories at all.
And I would eat just for the eating's sake. Oy!
If I was a thin girl,
No didydidydidydidydidydidydidiet.
All day long I'd noshinoddynosh.
If I was a trim slim girl.
I wouldn't have to diet.
No didydidydidydidydidydidydidiet.
If I was a barely bone and skin,
Slim and trim, really thin girl.
Lord, who made the sugar and the wheat,
Made them surely for us all to eat.
Please perform another giant feat
And turn me into a thin girl.
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